


Ol' Blue Eyes

by yourebrilliant



Category: White Collar
Genre: Crack, Kittens, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-16
Updated: 2013-01-16
Packaged: 2017-11-25 18:18:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/641668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yourebrilliant/pseuds/yourebrilliant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Peter thinks Neal has a bizarre escape plan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ol' Blue Eyes

**Author's Note:**

> I have no excuse for this XD It's the result of a conversation between [](http://b-scholes.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://b-scholes.livejournal.com/)**b_scholes** and me

‘El, this is insane,’ Peter said, his voice low and intense. ‘I don’t know what I was thinking, we can’t do this anymore. We shouldn’t have done it in the first place.’

‘But it makes Neal so happy,’ El said, her eyes wide and beseeching.

‘Twelve, El,’ Peter countered, his hands braced on his hips, his suit jacket rucked up behind his arms. ‘ _Twelve_. They’re on the couch, they’re on the stairs. They’re on the dog, El.’ El, looked down at Satchmo and frowned. ‘Now,’ Peter raised his hand to stop her arguing, ‘it has to stop. I don’t care if he cries like a little girl, you can’t keep buying Neal kittens every time he’s upset!’

El looked around at the bundles of fur dominating the room and sighed. ‘Fine,’ she muttered, ‘but you get to tell him.’

Peter rolled his eyes expressively. ‘Where is he?’

El looked around, confused. ‘Uh, I don’t know, actually. He was around earlier. Neal?’ she called.

‘Neal?’ Peter said quietly. El looked back to see Peter frowning at a small black kitten that had just launched itself onto the dining room table and now sat watching Peter calmly through bright blue eyes. ‘Godammit Neal!’ he exclaimed.

‘Peter, what on earth?’ El asked.

‘Don’t you see?’ Peter declared, one arm waving wildly as he spoke. ‘He played us! Kitten after kitten after kitten, so _of course_ we wouldn’t notice just one more. And then, when we have to take them all back, guess who goes with them!’

‘Peter,’ El said despairingly, ‘you’re not seriously suggesting that Neal pretended to be deeply upset twelve times just so that he could _turn into a kitten_ and escape?’

‘Sounds like it to me,’ a voice said, with icy calm.

Peter’s head snapped up and El spun round; Neal was standing in the patio doorway, looking betrayed, gardening gloves and a pair of shears clutched in one fist. For a long moment, Neal and Peter stared at each other, then Neal turned away, letting the door close behind him as he retreated to the patio. El turned back to Peter.

‘I’ll call the pet store,’ Peter said immediately.

‘Oh no you won’t,’ El said firmly. ‘You’re right, we can’t keep giving him kittens. You broke this, you’re going to go out there and fix it.’ Reaching out, she turned Peter around and gave him a gentle shove towards the back door.

Peter sighed and straightened his coat. ‘Fine.’ As he passed the dining room table, something seemed to occur to him and he reached out and scooped up the little black kitten that was still sitting there. ‘C’mon you furry little troublemaker,’ he muttered, ‘help me out here.’

 

‘So,’ Neal said, as Peter eased out the back door, ‘you gonna get me a flea collar to go with my anklet now?’

Peter sighed heavily and set the kitten down on the patio table. Neal was sitting on the farthest away chair and the kitten immediately padded across the table top to rub against his arm. Neal reached out and scooped him up, gently stroking the soft fur under his chin as he watched Peter sit next to him. ‘I deserve that,’ Peter said bluntly. ‘I was absolutely wrong. I don’t even know what I was thinking, I mean, I know you!’

‘Maybe that’s what you were thinking,’ Neal commented quietly.

‘No,’ Peter said harshly, leaning across the table, ‘I don’t mean, “I know your past crimes”, Neal,’ he said intensely, ‘I mean, “I know what kind of man you are”, “I know what you’ve sacrificed for this job, for this relationship”. “I know you wouldn’t con us in any way, even with kittens!”’

The corner of Neal’s mouth quirked up in a half smile and he buried his face in the soft fur of the kitten that was now curled up against his chest.

‘What’s his name?’ Peter asked, nodding to the kitten.

‘Sinatra,’ Neal commented, looking over at Peter with eyes so similar to the vulnerable little kitten in his hands.

‘Ol’ Blue Eyes,’ Peter commented awkwardly. ‘Good name.’ There was a long pause before Peter sighed again. ‘Neal, you know you can’t keep them, right?’

Neal smiled crookedly. ‘I know. I’ve arranged for homes for them all. All except Sinatra,’ he added, looking at Peter with a hopeful expression.

Peter smiled wryly. ‘Okay, Frankie can stay.’

Neal beamed. ‘So,’ he said shrewdly, ‘who’s riding your ass?’

Peter looked at him sharply. ‘How did you know-‘

Neal rolled his eyes. ‘Whenever you get stressed you freak out and say stupid things.’

Peter chuckled, reaching out to stroke a finger between the sleepy kitten’s ears. ‘Ruiz is making a fuss again about something or other. Reese is doing his best, but...’

‘Well, go and get the file, then,’ Neal said. ‘Let’s see if we can work it out.’

Peter looked over at him for a long moment. Then he stepped round the table cupped a hand under Neal’s chin. ‘I don’t deserve you,’ he murmured quietly. Leaning down, he kissed Neal deeply. ‘Either of you,’ he commented, nodding to El, who was standing in the doorway.

Neal grinned at him. ‘You do alright,’ he commented archly. ‘Most of the time.’ Peter grinned crookedly, pressing a quick kiss on El’s lips as he headed inside for the files.

‘You alright?’ El asked, crossing the patio to stroke Neal’s hair and smile down at Sinatra. The kitten deigned to open one blue eye in response. ‘Believe it or not, that was an apology.’

‘Oh, I believe it,’ Neal said earnestly. ‘He said he knows I’d never con him.’

El looked impressed. ‘And so he should,’ she said archly. ‘Good to see him admit it. And how many of our furry friends get to stay?’ she asked, reaching out to stroke Sinatra. The kitten tilted its head encouragingly.

‘Only the best one,’ Neal said, nodding to the tiny kitten in his hands.

‘Oh, well,’ El sighed. ‘He does get on best with Satchmo. I’ll call Mrs Bieder in the morning. Now,’ she said briskly, seeing Peter stepping back onto the patio, ‘which dastardly criminal are we trying to catch today?’

Grinning, Peter opened the case file and spread it out on the patio table.


End file.
